This Is Me

Coming alone to Singapore was not my choice. I do not know why I chose to be here. I do not understand why I wanted to be here. I do not foresee how I can survive alone here. I felt lonely the moment I stepped into NTU. Everything was unfamiliar to me, the buildings, the people, and every single thing.

To protect myself against the potentially harmful uncertainty, I act, in front of parents, acquaintances, friends. I am tired of being pretentious. I may appear strong outside, yet I feel weak inside. I feel unsettled deep in my heart, worrying about every single day spent in NTU, tormented by the possible problems I am going to face, and all these lead to sleeping difficulty. If only I were a little more sociable, a little more composed, and a little more mature, I may not need to worry as much as I am now. Or, am I simply being overly pessimistic?

I am still attached to my life at home. I miss my parents dearly, tears often stream down my face by just talking to them on the phone. I miss my peers in Malaysia too. It saddens me to realize that friends come and go in our life, and it is impossible to be together forever because we have different goals and visions to pursue. Nonetheless, I do not want to feel upset all the time as this affects my studies and my emotional stability.

Since this is the destination I have chosen for my next four years, I must adapt well and persevere through. I must have faith in myself and in the will of God. I will seek strength from the Lord. “Lord Jesus, I need You. Please bless me with faith and the strength to persist on to eventually achieve my goals.” Amen.

*Please read the comment after you had read this :) *

8 comments:

ViNcenT said...

Hi guys,what I wrote there is not real de. Haha,half true half not lo. That is my assignment. To achive the purpose and voice,to fulfill the Sentence Patterns that the lecturer want,only I write in this way. Haha...I al alright,fine here. No worries ler. Enjoy my assignment,haha.

Lovely Life... said...

aiseh...tats is not funny k..

ur junior, kar ying said...

hi my beloved kp, ahaha..
long time no c u jor wor..
ur dis blog a reli can gik sei ppl d la..i tot u reli cry tim! aaha.. got got a? if got don pai seh write out wo..
i won laugh de.. wink* so howz life? yer.. y so unfair de.. so many singer go there.. hui yo.. unfair unfair unfair!haha.. but anyway.. u gambate wo!v wil suport u de..miss u le..i rmb a..u owaz zat me 1 lo..ah fa wo..now a lotz of ppl cal me tat name lo..suddenly lik zap guan jor tim..haha..thx 2 u lo..swt* when u cum bec o?cum bec tat time muz hv 1 gathering ya?don tat time forget us wo..but i c u oso won ge la..haha..okla..gud luck ya!bb.. =)

εγrιquε said...

u are one pondicherry la! (you will know wat tat means when u come bek msia)

I miss u lotz too laa.. haha.. and i would have never thought you would write such nice post..

Seriously, that was very very nice. I was kinda moved.

Cheerz my dear pal. Whatever you do, you will always have my support!

And thanks for the birthday card! I really loved it!

ahgau said...

yoyoyo, napet seng... hahaha so long no call u like tat oredi... so, life in NTU is like tat de la.. tak han mou si zhou, then go around bluff ppl with fake blogs..

so, go there oredi stil go napet napet or not???? or bcome macho oredi go kau singapore leng lui's... i think u stil will stick with napet style...(^-^)wahahaha...

Hope u faster come back la.. miss u alot here la.. after u go away liao, nobody here let me bully oredi.. nobody here let me zhat oreid.. summore dun hv balloon butt for me 2 hit.. haha damn.. i miss those bouncy flesh wahahaha... whack on it very syok de..

p/s: actually le, tis blog he paksa me write de.. i also duno wat 2 write oredi, so juz crap around la.. haha

QinZ said...

Here dude, you are where u are because of the decision u made before, dont think too much , live the way u are, do the best u can, take K, See u in Malaysia soon.

Anonymous said...

wth.. ur lecturer reads ur blog?? omg

ViNcenT said...

Nope. My lecturer did not read my blog. I just paste here for fun,hehe... But the way,who are u?